Relatives and friends of cancer patients

Cancer is a bad news not only for the person with the disease but for his or her relatives and friends.  Relatives and friends find they have to think about how they relate the person that nave cancer. It is hard to see a loved one becoming sick .

Many questions prey on cancer patient’s relatives’ and friends’ minds. Will he/she recover? What should you say to the person who has cancer? How can help/support? Should I talk about cancer to him/her? Many people feel that they are reacting and thinking about it wrongly.

Each person faces the crisis in his or her own way. It often takes a while before you are ready to take in the fact of having a serious illness. Work, hurrying about or drinking can all shield one from reality. understanding and coping with the situation will happen in its own time. A practical and calm approach will help you face the situation and avoid unnecessary trepidation.

The best support friends or relatives can give those with cancer is to be there for them and to be prepared to listen to them. It is better to encourage loved ones who are ill to talk about difficult matters than to try to get them to forget about their critical situation. It also takes courage on the part of listeners to confront their own feelings. Sometimes loved ones may feel disappointed if those who are ill do not respond as was hoped, but instead remain aloof or reject the help being offered them. However, the support and care that relatives and friends provide is not wasted.

Advice for the relatives and friends of people with cancer

  • Before visiting its advised to ask permission if its OK to come and visit or when its a good time to come and visit
  • If you don’t feel well yourself,stay away don’t visit,cancer patients can have a weak immune system due to their treatment
  • Be positive when talking,if you can’t say positive things,don’t say anything
  • Support the person with cancer as best you can: sometimes simply your presence and nearness are enough.

  • Keep up relationships outside the family: relatives and friends are needed for support during recovery.

  • Try to continue doing the things and recreation that have previously been doing ,planning things for the future -its a source of strength and hope.

  • Supporting someone who is ill is easier when you deal with your own fears, for instance by discussing them with a third party.

  • Be available and tell the person who is ill that you are there for them.Offer to help in daily chores

  • If the person who is sick withdraws and does not want to talk, don’t take it personal,continue to be present and to offer help.

  • Remember that the illness is tiring: if the person who is ill does not feel up to doing something together today, they might tomorrow.

Support for relatives and friends

When a family member has cancer, it requires energy and endurance on the part of other family members and friends. If some things feel too difficult to cope with, it’s good to say so openly.

A loved one of someone with cancer may also need help and support. Family members and friends can get in touch with the one of the regional cancer associations.

Giving gifts

Finding out that you are having cancer is a life changing moment to the patient and his family.In the fight against cancer you will find yourself facing sometimes daily challenges .During this time the patient is alone with the pain and side affects and of course thoughts  . Sitting in a chair  getting the chemo thru  his or hers veins,Laying in a hospital bed for other treatments or being at home after treatment.Its very important to make those times very comfortable .Its important to make sure that your gift is right to the patient considering that their immune system might be affected from their treatment,also they might be on a certain food restrictions ,Many patients develop sensitivity to smells ,you want to cheer the patients so when buying a book make sure it doesn’t have a sad end etc,

Here are a few gift idea:

  • Magazines, audio books, novels, books ,iPad or similar

  • DVDs of movies, music CDs .TV shows.

  • Crossword or Sudoku puzzles

  • Portable hobby  kits for scrap booking, drawing, or needlepoint

  • Care packages